Worried somebody you love might be depressed? It can be hard to tell when someone you love is truly “depressed” versus feeling sad and “down” due to this pandemic and how it’s turned our lives upside down. I know when my kids first got home after their college semesters were canceled, I was worried. Wendy feels the same and wanted to know what to do when the normal loving encouragement isn’t working to lift her daughter out of her funk. This is a growth opportunity for us all. It’s hard to watch someone you love suffering. Remind yourself that feeling sad, mourning losses and going through periods where “you’re not yourself" is the way you build resilience. Simple things do make a huge difference: a routine, exercise, eating healthy, getting outside, sleep, talking to friends and planning something to look forward to when this passes. Focusing on these habits will help whether you're dealing with sadness or depression.
It’s natural to want to make someone's pain go away. You can’t. You can check in and listen. You can ask them about what they’re feeling and what you could do, or stop doing, to make it easier for them. They might not even know. That’s okay too. Let them process this how they need to. Ultimately it’s going to be up to the person you love to do the work to heal themselves.
And, for all you parents out there - know that your kids might aim their pain at you. That’s happening in households all over the world right now. They want someone to blame for this. It’s an emotional wave we’re riding, so if they start to come out of their funk, don't be surprised if as the date for their canceled graduation approaches, they may dip down again.
If after a few weeks, there’s still no moments of “up” to the “down”, or your loved one seems to be getting worse, absolutely seek out the professional support they need.
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Mel
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